“Unhappy” Marriage


Hi Brooke!
Thank you for all that you do!!! It’s so amazing to learn from you!
For the last 7 or 8 years of my marriage, I have been “unhappy”. After listening to your podcasts and joining SCS, I realized that it was me who can decide whether I want to be happy. However, I think am still deciding to be unhappy. I have many negative thoughts about my husband and our relationship: I am not in love with him; I don’t like when he kisses me; we are not a good match; I am not attracted to him and I never really was; I will never feel passionate about him or for him. I have used the March homework to help me try to create new thoughts about him, but I don’t yet believe them. After listening to Ep 157, my thought went from “I don’t want to be married to my husband” to “I don’t want to be married to my husband and that’s ok”. This helped a little but my feeling is still doubt. I think I also resent him bc after I told him I had an affair, he said that if I left, he would take away my children and my successful business and I would have nothing left. What new sentences can I tell myself that I can actually start to believe? Any thoughts are so appreciated!!!!