unintentional models to the numbing feeling posted a short time ago


I posted about feeling numb after a difficult weekend. It’s taking everything out of me to try and model this out. I just can’t come up with the intentional models that are believable. I’d like some help. Thank you in advance.

C: Gary said, “You are always in the middle of any conflict that goes on in the family.”
T: He is so cruel to say that especially when I am looking and asked for his support.
F: incredibly hurt
A: cry a lot, feel like I want to run away, feel like I had the wind knocked out of me, want to isolate, tell him I hate him for saying that, experiencing physical pain in my stomach and in my head
R: no support from my husband with a problem I am having with my daughter, beaten down, shell shocked, numb, want to isolate

C: me
T: I don’t know how to move on from these rock bottom feelings
F: depressed
A: writing models without knowing how to write intentional models that feel believable, stepping back from my interaction with my family, trying not to just get back in bed and fall asleep so I don’t have to feel this way
R: feeling paralyzed, alone, stomach hurts, self-loathing, unsupported by husband, angry with husband, hopeless