Unpacking the Model


I’m a SCS newbie (first month here), and enjoying the study vault, content in general, and podcasts.

I’ve had a few 1:1 coaching sessions as well. I’m a facts and data nerd, Type A, and I love to figure things out. I am having trouble with the Model and I genuinely want to unpack where I’m getting stuck. I’ve tried to ask questions on the last couple 1:1 calls, but they are so short, and just when we start to get into it, times up. So here I am.

I’m getting hung up on the idea of what the point of the Model is. I understand the concept around figuring out your triggers, and that your thoughts control feelings, and feelings drive actions and results (I get it, it makes complete sense), but the feedback I’ve been getting in these sessions is that I need to stop treating time like it exists, and leading from a “lack of abundant mindset”; meaning…I’ve brought up the concept in my sessions that I don’t think it’s necessary in my life to unpack every person in my life or periphery that I am letting cause negative feelings

(Specific example: I want to shield my kids from racists, and not invite/welcome family members into my whole who vehemently believe in “all lives matter” and have racist undertones), because simply put: I don’t have the energy to time to waste my life in environments that don’t serve me…and I’ve been told that that’s a lack of abundant mentally and all we have is time…which (facts and data and lover of science here!): we don’t.)

If we get philosophical about it: I understand that time is a construct…BUT the reality is…we only have so much time/space in a given day between when we’re awake and asleep…and ultimately we will die. So I firmly believe that I don’t want to waste my energy and time (or call it whatever it Model appropriate here), in environments that don’t serve me because life is short. I’ve been informed that this is coming from a place of lack of abundance, and that I should consider all these thoughts around my racist relatives as “Oh, that’s interesting”, and be open to all situations all the time because time is all we have, and I don’t agree with that at all.

Help. This is making me not ascribe to the Model or the teachings, and I do feel that I’m getting a lot out of the learnings, but I need to sort this piece out if I’m going to continue benefitting and figuring out the Model or how to use it effectively, and not think it’s some flowery, idealistic tool, meant for people who are trying to be in a perfect state of zen and accepting of everything without issue.

Thoughts? Thanks!!