Because of a period of change & stress at work, my home is untidy all the time & this upsets me and worsen my stress. I’ve worked on 2 models, can I have some feedback and maybe some ideas about where to start?

(start with T, unintentional)
C: living room items on the coffee table, big table, vacuum cleaner out. In our bedroom items on chest of drawers, clothes on bed.
T: The home is always untidy these days: I am a disappointment to myself
F: self blame
A: lash out at husband and maybe son – ‘you are not helping me enough’
avoid tidying routines that work thus don’t tidy
overeat
be even more perfectionistic and victim blaming ie blaming myself – ‘I’m not doing enough! I am a failure at looking after my home! others don’t help me!’
R: home becomes more untidy due to my lack of tackling this

(intentional model, start with R)
C: living room items on the coffee table, big table, vacuum cleaner out. In our bedroom items on chest of drawers, clothes on bed.
T: I’ll take it one step at a time and tackle this
F: self care
A: take to coaching & focus on this in October as a goal as it will contribute to my wellbeing
Choose one or two small routines that are very doable & plan them in. Don’t aim for perfection or full decluttering, just tidy spaces for now
Ask cleaner to come a second time a week temporarily, during transitional time of high stress at work
work on meal planning & prep with husband which he’s willing to do so that in the evenings I can do some tidying (instead of all the time taken with cooking)
when I leave each room carry something with me that belongs elsewhere
when I do anything, complete all tasks so that things are left tidy
R: I create a tidy home that makes me feel serene and supports me during time of stress