upsetting people

I know that we are meant to stay out of other people’s models, but at what point are we just being selfish? For example, if you know that an A you take will become the C in someone else’s model and has been known to trigger painful T’s for them, at what point do you sacrifice what you want in order to avoid hurting someone you care about? Some examples that come to mind would be: breaking up with someone, firing someone, going back on a promise, cheating, lying. Does it all come back to “liking your reasons”?

Similarly, I sometimes view The Model as lacking empathy and compassion. Even when I get coached sometimes, I am baffled by Coach’s stone cold glare back at me. I also read the answers here in Ask a Coach and I feel they lack understanding and sensitivity.

I am coming from a place of curiosity. I am not judging The Model or the Coaches, and I am not upset or angry. I have no problem keeping the thought “The Model lacks empathy” because truth be told, I do believe that thought serves me. However, I AM curious where empathy might fit in.