Using the model to buffer??

Hi! This month I’ve been confused about creating new thoughts (to produce different feelings) while trying to actually learn to feel current feelings. A couple of calls ago you told a guy you were coaching that he was buffering with the model – and I was like “oh no, I’ve been to.”. So how do I know when creating an intentional model is right and best move and how do I know when it’s a distraction from feeling? Thank you!