I had previously posted a model of this

C – my sister is 46 and is choosing not to get vaccinated
T – she should be vaccinated
F – righteous / frustrated
A – talk about her behind her back, judge her, ruminate

The result I thought I might have in this model is ‘I should manage my mind’.

The ask a coach response was that my R was ‘I don’t manage my mind and irritate myself’. So true. And it feels much more peaceful to me to manage my mind and love my sister regardless of her choice.

But when we talk about how the R will tie back to the T, is there another way to tie this back to my T? When we ‘should’ in our T line about other people, is the result kind of always ‘we are not managing ourselves when we try to have thoughts about others’?