Victim mentality or deciding it doesn’t serve you anymore?


Is there a difference between approaching a relationship with a victim mentality and avoiding the resulting negative feelings, vs. deciding that a relationship doesn’t serve you anymore and moving on?

Objectively, following the “every circumstance is neutral” train of thought, there would never be a behavior that someone would have to avoid because none of it would ever mean anything bad or good, it all can glide by without emotional acknowledgement. Right?

It also makes sense that people can come into your life whose behaviors do not align with your goals and values, is it really avoidance or personal victimization to decide not to invest anymore time or effort into a relationship with that person? And I am not talking about resenting, withholding love, or punishing, but simply redirecting energy to something else.

Are there any podcasts or Scholars lessons you think might help me understand my question and your response better?

Thank you!