My husband and I have had some conflict recently over a few hobbies that I have picked up. Now that our kids are getting older I have started taking dance lessons. I really enjoy it and it’s lots of fun for me. My husband thinks it’s weird and thinks I’m a little too obsessed. I am having a hard time just letting him have his own opinion and not caring. I want his approval. This has been an ongoing issue in our marriage. I have a really hard time when he disagrees with me on anything because it makes me feel vulnerable.
Here is my model:
C: Husband says I am getting too obsessed with dance hobby
T: This is terrible that he doesn’t approve of me
A: Mentally spin, over obsess about it, judge him for his feelings, hide what I am doing from him
R: I don’t approve of me
How can I get stronger and not need his approval so much?