Wanting to be “the good student”


I had a mini breakthrough related to the program that I wanted to share with others in case there are other perfectionists in our ranks. To give some background, I’ve always been a “good student”. Getting the answers right + my teachers’ approval has long been integral to my sense of self. I’ve been working on changing this mindset — from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset — but it pops back up from time to time.

In particular with the SCS program! 🙂 I love submitting my questions here and I eagerly anticipate your (Brooke’s) answer, and when you say “looks like you’re rocking it” it makes my day, but when you say “you’re not going to like this” or I accidentally posted the same question twice (ugh! sorry! PSA: don’t reload the page!) or I get the sense that I didn’t express my question clearly and I’m not sure you “got me” perfectly, I feel a little defeated, like I’m a bad student and I got it wrong.

So I did a thought download on it this morning, and realized that, while I have so. much. admiration and respect for you, Brooke, my thought from now on is going to be: “I’m here to get Brooke’s wisdom and teachings, to use and apply them to my life. I don’t need Brooke to understand and approve of me; I need ME to understand and approve of ME.”

I imagine this comes up in any coach/coachee relationship — I don’t know if you have some insights on that, Brooke? Thank you!