Weekly homework hurdle


Brooke, I signed up for this month because of the money course. When my workbook on changing the past came, I was momentarily disappointed that it wasn’t about money, but when I learned that money was the bonus and I started reading the workbook I realized that this is exactly what I needed.

It was so empowering to read the first few pages. I had family members who commented on my weight and gave me a complex that resulted in eating disorders and anxiety and health problems that I have today which I doubt I would have had otherwise. My father would oink at me when I ate and enjoyed food. My grandparents constantly mentioned my weight behind my back and to my face from an early age. Looking at photos of myself from that time, I was far from overweight.

I totally get the part about taking from the event things that are empowering — I have no doubt that I learned empathy for others through this experience and I can get behind that. But I’m finding myself for question 4 (What is the story you WANT to tell yourself?) writing snarky, angry answers and I feel like that’s probably not the direction I should come from. My first thought was, “The story I want to tell myself? My family sucks!” But that’s not really positive.

I don’t believe they came from a standpoint of caring — it was quite clear from their behavior towards others that they were just flat-out mean human beings. Perhaps they were wounded somehow themselves. Is that a better way of putting it? I still have a lot of anger about it, and I guess that means part of the issue is that I still need to work out and believe the good outcome of it and get beyond it, is that right?