I had a wonderful coaching session last night with Mason and he had me think of all the reasons why I would think the guy I’m talking to would probably leave me or not be all in.

I wrote them out today and it’s real ugly. I’m not really sure what the next step is. We were able to realize that none of this really has to do with this guy and is much more about me and not feeling worthy.

Looking at this list- I don’t want to think this anymore.  I could write out a list of why he would stay which could be all the opposites, but it’s really hard for me to believe the complete opposite list of the original negative list.

What’s my next step?
How do I take this negative list and immobilize it?

Some examples of my list would be:
Too Fat
Too Old
Too honest
Too tall
Not rich enough
Don’t know how to cook

Horrible stuff like that. It took writing out this list (which is much longer in real life) to realize how mean I am being to myself. I don’t like it, but at the same time it’s been my narrative for so long it’s almost scary to take away because I’m so comfortable in it…