When a patient dies

I’m a veterinarian.
I’m slowly realising that ‘being a vet is really hard’ is an optional thought.
But somedays really sad things happen and I find myself walking around with sadness and regret which makes it hard to focus on the patients at hand.
I feel like I’m carrying around the patients we couldn’t save.
Some of the time there’s nothing I could’ve done different but some of the time I wish I’d seen something I didn’t, or with the benefit of hindsight I wish I’d done something different.
It hurts and makes me question my career choice.
I’m actually good at what I do but I want to be perfect.
C patient died after I referred to a specialist
T I should’ve done more
F regret
A do less in my present day
R might miss something today

C patient died
T I did my best and what I thought was right at the time
F sad but at peace
A learn from experience
R get better

I always want my best to be better than it is.

I welcome your comments.