Hi Brooke,
I know this question has been asked by many before, and I have gone through the responses. But I feel I would benefit with your advice/insight.
When do I change a thought/feeling?
This morning, I applied 2 drops of herbal oil on my son’s (1 year old) head. Got this idea from a friend for accelerating hair growth on babies. It has a strong smell (not necessarily bad though).
My husband texted me after dropping him at daycare. He said – I warned you not to apply the herbal oil for his hair. He goes around hugging everyone, and we are going to be judged for the strong smell. You only care about what you want to do and less about how the child would be treated…blah blah
My model:
C : Husband says we may be judged
T: Oh no, I shouldn’t have applied the oil. My son is gonna walk around judged all day
F: Awful
A: Withdraw, avoid feeling awful.
R: Not watching thoughts
In the above model, my result is not proving my original thought. How can I correct the model?
I know feeling “awful” is not going to serve me with accomplishing my tasks for today (I am doing the September course as well). When do I change it? How do I know I have fully felt it and its now ok to change it?
My new model would be:
C: same
T: I accept full responsibility for it, and ill figure out some other way to get the oil on his head. (May be apply before bed or something)
F: determined
A: add a task to my calendar to apply oil after dinner every night
R: Figured out a way to solve the problem.
Thank you so much