I don’t feel any love towards my husband any more , I am aware that it’s optional and can think my way back to feeling love , the truth is i don’t want to . I rob myself of this feeling , I just don’t want to be with him any more . We have been working on the project with a new property to start rent it and I feel like I have a cement block tied to my foot – one step forward , two steps back . I know he will never change , I got that part , and with this work in scholars my manual got thinner , but if I can’t accept him , I still have one . I’m not sure I can drop it completely . I don’t hate him , I just became indifferent . I’m not blaming him for anything , I just don’t want to be together anymore . I fantasize my life and it’s light and focused without him pulling me down , calling names , comparing to younger women and so on.