I’ve heard that we shouldn’t go straight from an unintentional model to an intentional model.
What if the intentional model does feel true and immediately feels better? Is it ok then, or should I still sit with the unintentional model and process the emotions first? Can I then jump to the intentional model in the same self-coaching session?
For example, I delivered my first group webinar the other day and it didn’t go how I’d hoped. I came away from the session feeling disappointed, uncomfortable and embarrassed. I immediately did some models.
My unintentional model was:
C: my webinar
T: that was bad
A: hide, avoid feedback, avoid participants, avoid doing it again.
R: I don’t get better
T: it was a good first effort
A: think about what went well and what I can improve, take feedback, do it again soon
R: get better at it
The intentional model felt just as true, if not more true. I’ve been able to keep referring back to it if the discomfort comes back.
Should I have sat in the discomfort first? When should I NOT go to an intentional model? Provided I choose a new thought that I believe and it feels better, why can’t I always go straight to it?
Thanks for your help.