Who is in my thought line?

I am working through a situation where a friend of mine expressed frustration with me while planning an event. We are meeting in person, so I wanted to clean up my thoughts so I don’t show up feeling defensive, but instead curious.
My unintentional model:

C: My friend told me she’s frustrated with me
T: She’s so dramatic
F: Dismissive
A: Defend myself instead of listening to her, dismiss her feelings, feel superior because I can see whats happening in her mind
R: I don’t show up how I want to be and she is still frustrated with me.

When I move to intentional models, I still have her in my thought lines:
T: She doesn’t know her thoughts are creating her frustration with me
F: Understanding
A: Don’t take things personally, ask questions, show up loving her
R: I show up as the person I want to be

But I don’t know that I’m getting it right. I’m not sure I should have “She” statements in my thought line even though that is the thought I had, and I don’t feel like the R is proving the T line. Help cleaning this up please!