T- He should be less critical and sarcastic.
A- Be on the defense when he calls, Be really short with him, judge him, be defensive when he says something about me, defend myself
R- I’m critical of my dad
I’m really making what he says as almost an attack on me. For example, the other day he said to me – Well if you decided to be a teacher, you could be having off with them too. (I went to school to be a teacher, but decided not to). In that moment, I felt hurt by what my thought was which was – My dad should be on my team and supporting whatever I’m doing now. I also move into – He should less critical and sarcastic.
I do I accept him? Like – Oh my dad says words? I’m assuming I need to drop the he is critical and sarcastic thought.
If you loved and accepted him exactly as he is (if you weren’t critical of him), how would you show up differently? What would you need to think and feel to show up that way?
C – Dad
F – curious (for right now)
A – Manage my thoughts, take ownership of my own thinking
I feel like I need to be in defensive mood when I talk with him, but really it’s that I need to be alert myself so I can see what kinds of thoughts I am saying to myself when he talks to me, right? I still drop into blaming him for what he says about me instead of taking ownership for my thinking.