We went to see Wonder Woman this weekend on Saturday. Unlike my usual self, I did not look up the movie and read the plot line before going, I just went with a plan to take it as it came. We got our tickets, treats, and started into the theater. I never really realized before, but most of the time my guys follow me. So I should share that usually at the movies I sit in the very first row, right inside the door, next to the exit so I can get out of the dark theater if I start to feel claustrophobic. I am fine with Chad or Zach on one side, but otherwise I want to have a clear path to the exit. This time, in the theater I went in and up the stairs I went. I climbed up ½ way (about 8 rows) and walked to the middle of the row and sat down. It was then I turned and looked and Chad and Z. They were both just standing there staring at me with their mouths open. And after like 1 minute, Chad was like, “are we sitting HERE?” and I was like “Yes, yes we are” and he was like “really?!?!” and I was like “yup” and they sat. I caught them both staring at me on and off for the next 5 minutes, especially when people sat on either side of us blocking my exit from the row, I think they both expected me to start running and screaming, but I just sat in my seat, felt what was going on in my body and kept telling myself there was no feeling I could not handle experiencing. When the lights went down, I did feel the panic starting, stomach tight and flipping and tingling in my ribs, but I was like, I can handle this, bring it on body, there is nothing I cannot make it through and then it was gone! Of course, I had a movie to watch, which probably helped. Lots of adventure, action and suspense and I LOVED IT!!!! It did not upset me to not know what was coming, it was so interesting. I did it! And when the movie was over, I actually got up and went out with the crowd. Instead of sitting in my seat and waiting for the theater to empty with my eyes were closed, I went out with everyone and Chad was like “Who are you and what have Rachel and Brooke done with my wife?” and I think there was also an “I would not have believed it if I had not seen it with my own eyes”. I did it. I faced the theater fears, felt my feelings, believed I could handle whatever came and made it to the other side . And I enjoyed the movie so much! And I am so proud of me! And what an appropriate movie to do it in, strong women on screen, strong woman in the audience! Thank you, thank you, thank you for helping me change my life.
Kathleen