Worry thought loop

Hi Brooke,

First, thanks so much for sharing your incredible insights. I have been a scholar for 4 months now and have learned so much.

Sometimes I find myself in a thought loop of worry. It is definitely illogical, indulgent, and not useful. But I can’t seem to get out of it.

C – I made a doctor appt to check out a lump.
T – it is most likely nothing… But it could be something (followed by rabbit hole of catastrophe, entirely in my head)
F – very anxious, physically and emotionally
A- google rabbit hole. Try breathing, meditating, Exercising (helps a bit), talking to family.
R – spend day feeling anxious, fully aware that my worry has no use… Able to get through my day but it is HARD!

What does it mean to feel my feelings in this case? Focusing on the physical sensation doesn’t make it go away… Raised heart rate, twitchy muscles, etc. Trouble sleeping as well. This seems like a terrible way to spend a day. I know 50% of life is negative emotion… But really? This sometimes feels out of control, as doing the thought work so far has not made these anxiety bursts more manageable.

Intentional model:
C – doc appt to check out lump
T – nothing will change between now and appt. Doc will discuss next steps if any. I can handle whatever doc sends me (little voice screaming “yes but I can’t handle the waiting! Gah! Make the stomach knot go away!!)
A – wait to see doc
R – see doc.

Help please! I know I should feel my feelings but I am hardcore resisting this anxiety. What would it mean to stop resisting?

I feel anxious and that’s ok? (ya but I hate it!! I am watching myself spiral… And can compassionately observe… But then up goes the HR)

I can handle anxiety for 2 days while waiting for doc ?(ya but I don’t want to! Sleep is so much better than tossing and turning)

Thank you in advance!