Allowing feelings – deprivation, frustration, disappointment – when there feels nothing more beneath that.


I think the feelings I am trying to “allow” when I don’t drink or eat outside my plan are deprivation, disappointment, frustration at not getting what I want – that is, food, booze. And I’m finding it incredibly hard to tolerate! I try to embrace it and get curious but I can find nothing behind it other than “I don’t want to feel deprived.” My thought is always – “just have it, you’ll feel better, you can always sort it out tomorrow.” It’s pretty much a sub-conscious thought now, but that’s the thought I get, over and over. I’m trying to apply the Stop Over-drinking principles to food as I feel like I am doing ok with alcohol – I mean, I find it much easier to allow urges to drink. Food is much harder. Do you have any advice? I know I just have to do this, I just have to allow the urge/feeling and not act on it, but I still feel like I’m not in control, as if the whole time I am about to give in and eat something I don’t really want to eat. I think I might be ok with allowing the urges if only I felt like I wasn’t on the verge of not allowing them all the time!! How do I allow these feelings when I find them so very uncomfortable? When I embrace them I feel like all I do is stare at them, all day, and it’s all just VERY TENSE.
Any advice would be gratefully received. Thank you – all this information about urges and desire makes such huge sense, only I am finding it hard to apply “emotionally”.