Hi I want to stop drinking SO BAD it hurts !

Decided wine is too tempting and I cannot manage it so if I want to drink I could have anything else – this lasted a couple days until I saw someone offer up a bottle of wine – no thoughts came up I was like the friggen dog and just starting pouring and pouring – than the next two days equaled 2 more bottles – now I’m sick and so sad. In the moment I can’t seem to connect with the urge I just go numb and zombie my way over to it. Only real thinking happens in the middle of the night when I feel sick and sorry . Help please with what exactly I can do to stop and stay with it – I can practice pretending thru out the day ? I don’t want to drink period! I’m over it abusing and stealing my life –