Repeating the pattern.

I notice this habit of mine (after the fact) where I’m talking to someone who, in hindsight, would be a great fit for coaching.  They’re telling me something they are struggling with and instead of offering them help or making a verbal offer to work with me, I try to give them advice in the moment to help them get started.

It feels like I’m helping a friend, and I keep ‘friend-zoning’ myself, and keeping them from getting legitimate 1:1 help through coaching which would actually benefit them way more, usually about an hour alter I recognize I’ve don’t it again!  I think I’m doing them a disservice by not making them an offer to help them. Instead, I offer them what feels like a nugget of wisdom to get started.

I’m so frustrated with myself, I’ve done this to about 6 other people. One person even asked me if I know of a business coach and I didn’t have the nerve to tell her I could help her.  It’s like I panic and think that sending them resources would help them instead of ME. Ugh.
For some reason when I’m 1:1 and I’m caught off guard it’s like my brain forgets I’m a coach who can help them.

C: in person with Sara
T: I can send them podcasts/resources to help them
F: helpful
A: refer them to resources, don’t make the offer to help them myself
R: I’ friend-zone myself, don’t serve them, I don’t show up as an expert who can help.

Thank you!