Abandoning manuals in dating?

Hey Brooke!

I’m in the early stages of dating someone new and am coming up against some of the shoulds that live in my dating manual. As I uncover them, I’m working to shift my thoughts but am struggling with cleaning up my intentional model in a way that is genuine and open without projecting a manual. I’m also wondering what would be appropriate with regards to requests/boundaries at this stage. I’ve added some examples below and would love support brainstorming! Thanks so much in advance! 🙂

Unintentional model #1:
C: Ended a date without an invite for the next date
T: He should ask me out farther in advance
F: frustrated
A: overthink what I said/did, resent him, run hot/cold, get passive-aggressive, avoid open communication
R: I’m exhausted and it has no impact on him; we are disconnected

Intentional model #2:
C: Dating
T: I can’t control other people’s behavior? I want him to be him and me to be me? I want to be with someone who wants to prioritize spending time with me?
F: ???
A: ???
R: I show up as me honestly and openly; I appreciate him for who he is vs. trying to change him/his behavior. Connection is genuine