I want to say thank you for this program, and for offering the amazing amount of material that you do. I did not join in order to lose weight. I joined because I wanted to learn more about how you work, and I want to be the best version of myself. I joined towards the end of April, and since I didn’t have access to the monthly work yet, I watched the Overeating Workshop, and I’m so glad I did, because the work I’m doing from that workshop is changing my life. I might have been happy with my weight, and happy with how I looked, but I was definitely using food and alcohol to buffer. I’ve been planning my meals ahead since then, and it’s amazing.
Fast forward to this last weekend. My husband and I are selling our apartment in Hawaii. Should be a slam-dunk, easy process because everything is selling out there, but from Colorado we couldn’t monitor what our realtor was doing, which wasn’t a whole lot. We had an offer, lower than what we wanted, but whatever, we were happy. This last weekend we got a call that the offer fell through. The assessment was done and a ton of stuff needs to fixed that is falling apart. (We had a renter for 2 years.) We had a slow leak that we just learned destroyed the downstairs apartment while the occupant was away. We had paint peeling off of the walls and all manner of things that made the apartment not right for the price the realtor had priced it. The point of this is, that every day this week, I got really tough news. I was hearing what, to me, are huge numbers of dollars to be paid to fix this stuff and I was terrified. And I totally blew my own mind. I was terrified. And I didn’t grab cookies. I was so angry at the old realtor and myself for not paying more attention- and I did not drink. Not once. I actually sat in my car one day outside of my office, just shaking and allowing myself to feel the sadness and pain, and it totally flowed through me. And I went back inside and did some killer work with a teenager struggling to deal with several deaths in the family.
I didn’t overeat, I didn’t drink, I didn’t buffer it away. I realized that my lesson in this is that my mind needed to expand to accept that these “huge” numbers are just numbers. It’s just math. We are just going to do what we need to do. I have learned and now we are taking steps to and changing our strategy and working with someone who is taking care of what needs to be done. And it is weird and amazing to not be completely freaked out.
In the meantime, I’ve lost 14 pounds in 2 months, and I’m not really working that hard to do that. I’m just planning ahead.
So, thank you, Brooke. I continue to prove to myself that I am a person that can make commitments, feel my feelings and stay motivated. I’m excited to rewrite my past this month and see what else I am capable of!