Hey Brooke! I’m a little embarrassed to send you this Q, but here’s to vulnerability and growth! =)
So my boyfriend is going bald and it’s making me question my attraction to him. There, I said it. I know I love him SO very much, but when I think about or see the baldness, it makes me not want to be intimate, and I start feeling anxiety, and questioning our relationship. I judge myself because I don’t want to be vapid and I know it might be ridiculous, but it’s where I’m at.
So here is the model I created.
C- My boyfriend is going bald (that’s a circumstance, right, not a thought? Because it’s indeed happening…)
T- I’m not attracted
R-have anxiety, maybe even pick a fight about something else
C- My bf is going bald
T- My boyfriend is human
F- understanding (and in a way sympathy? although maybe this isn’t the best feeling to have)?
A-give love/or a hug
R-togetherness and connection
Is this correct? Also–in general–how long should it take for us to believe the new thought or are we supposed to believe it right away?