Hey there brooke,
Im always trying to remind myself that im enough exactly as i am and theres nothing i have to do to deserve love or to be “worthy” to be in this world.
But somedays, its difficult, i feel like im never doing enough. That im not motivated enough.
When i hear stories about other women having multiple jobs and building their businesses despite all of it or the girl whos still in college full time and starting her side hustle or the mom busting her butt to provide for her kids and keep herself healthy. Or just anyone doing more than me. I just have one job, which i find very simple yet I struggle to get home and work on my business. I hit snooze daily. Ive increased my netflix watching and my fast food runs.
I think sometimes “whats wrong with me that i cant do a simple thing like post on social media for my business when i dont have much going on in my life but theres that woman busting her butt cause she actually determined”
I feel like i should be inspired by these stories – i guess i am. I do beleive they are badass but then i use it as a way to make myself feel less.
I know its the thoughts their operating on.
And I dwell on everything i should be doing instead of actually doing it. Its almost a year in scholars and im dissappointed in myself for not being further along.
I guess i believe there’s something i have to be doing or somewhere i should already be to be considered worthy or like im actually doing something right in my life.
Its like i complain about things that i shouldnt br complaining about. I have it easy right now. Things are good right now in terms of having a place to sleep, having a job and a guy in my life who loves me.
Yet i feel like im completely failing at life because im not doing what i said id do or have what i said id have.