I heard Brooke coach about how something wasn’t a boundary issue but a manual issue. I very rarely set boundaries and think this is probably work I need to do but could you help me understand when something is a boundary violation vs a manual to drop? Some of the issues I’m trying to address right now are:
– we have a neighbor who regularly wakes us at night. Do I set a boundary or keep trying to drop the manual I have that they should be quiet at night. But it feels like a violation because our sleep is disrupted.
– my sister gets very drunk in front of my kids. Do I drop the manual I have that she shouldn’t do this, or set a boundary eg I’ll leave if she does that.
– someone we share a house with doesn’t take care of it and breaks and damages things. I have a manual that they should care for our home better. But am I justified in setting a boundary?
Thank you.