So i just read a question about bounderies and you wrote that we should set bounderies to protect ourselves.

I understand that with violence expect how do you do that from a place of love and not like be aggressive and tell them no?

Also setting emotional boundary I don’t get.

Why should we set boundaries? I mean if we make our own feelings. What is the goal?

Like I don’t get it. The whole concept of scs is that we make our feelings so why do we have to protect ourselves? From what?

What is the point of the boundary thing if we can choose how we want to think?

They don’t cause our feelings, so why should I say no to my mother in law to not drop by unannounced. If I could handle it by changing my thoughts. WHEN UND WHY? WHAT IS THE EXACT POINT?

Thanks so much!