I was diagnosed 8 years ago with congestive heart failure (am now 46). Since getting on heart medication, my heart tests within the normal range, although sometimes better than other times. 80% of people diagnosed are dead within 5 years. I’ve lead my life the last 8 years as if I’m on borrowed time. I worry I’ll get sick and not be able to work, will lose my mobility and need all kinds of crazy health care. This is completely contrary to what I experience on a daily basis. It’s true my medication slows me down when I exercise and makes me feel tired. I know this because when I forget to take it, it’s like I’m on fire and gets tons done. Still, I run a successful business, am a good mom to my teens and am in a great relationship where I’m able to travel internationally and do pretty much all I want. My fears/work have had the reward of a good income ($250-300k/year) and savings ($1.9 mil). I’m getting stuck making choices from a place of fear and scarcity. For example, I want more free time but continue to work like crazy because I’m afraid I will get sick and no longer be able to earn. This prevents me from assessing my life and my work from a place that might allow me to make positive changes. Its holding me back. My new thought this month is that I have complete and life-long excellent health. I feel if I could accept this, I’d lower my stress, take more healthy actions (more sleep, more recreation, eat better, prioritize exercise, spend more time for fun and relationships), so I’d actually be healthier. I would have time to see my work differently–see the forest for the trees. Ultimately I’d like to make the same or more income on 20 hours per week of work. I know I can’t do it continuing to do the same things I’ve always done. This health scarcity feeling is also holding me back on my primary love relationship. He wants to marry and although he makes the same or more than I, he’s a spender and I’m a saver. We’ve been together three years and engaged one year. He’s truly wonderful. Getting married makes me nervous mostly due to my scarcity feeling. I want to feel abundance and possibility and love. Certainly we make plenty, i can continue to earn and even if we didn’t work out I’d be fine on my prior savings.