Hi!
I have a newish friend (less than a year) that I have discovered has a really bad drinking problem. She consistently passes out and is so drunk she doesn’t know how she got home. Needless to say, this has been an ongoing problem for her for 20+years and she can get depressed to the point of suicidal actions.

I am really trying to stay neutral with my thoughts and not push her away, but it’s hard. Last night she called me and was so out of control, she became mean and by the end of the call she was so drunk she could barely talk and I had to peacefully end the call with her.

I did a thought download on this today and this is ONE of the thoughts that I came up with. But please can you help me with some more neutral thoughts to use when I am thinking this way? I’m struggling with what to think about it. Thanks so much.

Unintentional:
C: Friend called and told me she was upset about her life
T: Elaine blames everyone for her own life
F: Disappointment, indifferent, lack of sympathy
A: I don’t act like a loving friend, I push her away
R: I still believe my friend blames everyone for her life

Intentional:
C: Friend called and told me she was upset about her life
T: This is her life. She has a life and this is it.
F: Sympathy
A: Listening instead of trying to offer solutions, just being there
R: This is her life and she is living it.

Then I go back to wondering if I want a friend like this? I really don’t want to be on call for someone to call me and bitch about everything and it’s a huge energy sucker and I invest a lot of time into it and I’m not getting much out of the relationship right now. I know we can change our thoughts and feel peace with everything, but I’m struggling with this…

Thanks so much!
Angela