Credit card bill and graspiness

I spent 5 figures on a coaching program. I know it was the right choice for me, no issues there, however, I didn’t have the money in my bank account at the time so I put it on my credit cards. I have done this once before to pay for coaching (but only on one credit card instead of two) and it was really scary, but I made the money back before my credit card bill was due.

This time, there is a part of me that believes I might make it back before my credit card bill comes, but in the meantime until that happens, I am in super scarcity. My brain is telling me I can’t spend any money, but not like in a loving way where I am choosing intentionally, it’s more like I feel trapped and like I can’t spend any money because what if I actually don’t actually make the money back.

I’m having trouble coming out of it. I don’t want to feel like I’m so aware of money in this graspy way.