We were supposed to buy this vacation home in Florida, I told everyone about it, shared pictures, made plans, bought decor items for it, picked paint colors, 1000% believing it was going to happen.

THEN shit hit the fan, the mortgage broker who assured us all would be fine, was saying now it’s not. And financing fell through. I scrambled to find an alternative solution, but the sellers didn’t want to offer an extension that would allow us enough time to get a mortgage commitment.

I’m swirling now.. feeling so upset, feeling like I let myself down.. my family down.. I have to untell everyone, I feel like a failure – I’m just really sad and stressed right now. The anxiety I felt was suffocating. now I just want this pain to go away. I am trying to sit with it, but I just feel so awful.