Dishonor (dramatic sounding but just frustrating)


I think I’ve improved my skills in making an intentional model from an unintentional that serves me (my IMs have been 99% successful til now). The following UM has me stuck and I can’t come up with an IM that works for me.
UM
C: I have an incomplete calendar of tasks. I do not follow my calendar.
T: I am dishonorable to myself
F: ashamed
A: buffer with pseudo-productive work instead of doing MH1 each week, don’t make time to make a schedule/complete the calendar
R: I have not committed to MH1 and dishonor my desire to have a calendar/schedule

IM

C: I have an incomplete calendar of tasks. I do not follow my calendar.
T: I can complete MH1/my calendar and follow it
F: incredulous
A: nothing
R: not believing I will follow-through because duh!

I’ve tried several IMs but they all kind of come back to this. I’ve tried some ladder thoughts but they fall flat. Not sure why my brain won’t move forward with an actionable TFA… would appreciate some insight. Thx