Family Drama: Not Getting Involved, but Still Feeling Upset


My dad is upset with me because I did not answer his calls and only returned it 2 days later. I kept my calm and tried to explain I was busy at a wedding all weekend and had made plan to call him back once I get back – which I did. He didn’t understand that, got mad and told me he thinks I give more importance to my friends than I do to him.

I know this is not true and this is only his storyline and I don’t need to embark on the drama, so I told him I would not go there and kindly hang up. Although I feel like this is true for me I still experience frustration thinking he’s wrongfully judging me and feel the need to go back and try to get through to him. My model looks like this :

C – My dad having his own thoughts
T – He’s judging me but this is his stuff, I’m not getting into this argument
F – Somewhat relieved but still upset
A – Thinking about the argument over and over and considering calling back to prove my point
R- Feeding the argument, taking over the guilt he wants to pin on me

Somehow I cannot completely let go. I’m wondering if this a matter of accessing a thought that might be truer to me or something stronger?

Thank you.