I am Russian living in the UK for the past 5 years. I like the country and I feel myself at home here. However, I do not feel myself equal to people born and raised here. I am embarrassed of my accent (though it’s not that bad) and I don’t always understand what people are saying and have to ask again. When someone is not nice to me, I immediately jump to the thought “It’s because I’m a foreigner.” These limiting thoughts affect my life negatively. I restrict myself to applying only for language jobs and none of my friends are native British.
This is the model I guess:
C I am a foreigner living in the UK
T I am not as worthy as native British people
F Shame/ Embarassment
A Not making British friends and not applying for jobs I like
R I don’t have a job I like and I don’t have any British friends
I don’t like this thought. I know it is not true. I want to feel confident and worthy.