I’m doing the work on self-pity right now and struggling to answer the questions related to my problem. I’m not sure where I am with this: is it jealousy or self-pity? I regularly have strong emotions about pregnant women. I’ve had 6 miscarriages and have a non-functioning uterus. That’s the circumstance; I’m not able to bear children, naturally or through IVF. I often go into jealousy-mode of others who get pregnant, or self-pity for what I can’t have. The problem is, there’s nothing I can do about my circumstance. I can’t bear my own child. I’m now the mother of another woman’s child through adoption, so I did do something about wanting to be a mother. But it’s not the same as being able to effectively conceive and having a child that looks like me and my husband, and that makes me sad. I also feel like less of a woman sometimes; it seems so basic, to get pregnant, everyone gets pregnant, a lot of people get pregnant that don’t want to get pregnant. I really don’t feel like I ever deserved the curse of infertility. And I do understand that it wasn’t my path to have biological children; I know I would have never met my son had I been fertile. The question, “why aren’t you relying on yourself to change”- I don’t have the power to fix my uterus; nobody does. Is this where I need to work on my thoughts about this circumstance, including the jealousy and self-pity? If so, how do I start? I don’t know what I want to feel about this. I think I’ll always be a bit sad about it, and that might not be a terrible thing, but I don’t want my feelings to ever get in the way of my relationship with my son. Does any of this make sense? Thank you — 🙂