how do i know if i’m buffering or doing the work to get into alignment?

thank you so much for your amazing contribution to the world. thank you thank you.

for the past year, i’ve been on a personal development kick, specifically to deal with (often overwhelming) anxiety and fear. it’s been wild but i’ve never felt more whole overall. i’ve been seeing a therapist once a week for the past 8 months, listening to podcasts, reading books, and finally joined SCS. i’m excited and hopeful, even though i deal daily with my crazy mind, like i am even now at this moment where it’s telling me i’m not good enough, not doing enough, etc.

your course has been pivotal to my breaking out the pen and paper and starting the actual work. i seem to want to spend more and more time watching videos, listening to podcasts, reading books, and doing the homework. like i want to do it 4 hours a day. i haven’t been, because i have a full work life (i’m self-employed) and because i’m afraid of ignoring my work and losing business. and also i’m afraid that i’m buffering and becoming addicted to self help. how do i know if this is what i’m doing, or if i’m doing the work?