I feel stuck in a spin cycle and cannot seem to model my way out of it yet. I recently ended a relationship with a friend with ‘I love you and this relationship is complete for me’ wording and this person is not having it. She continues to reach out wanting to get together or talk on the phone. She wants to just ‘chat’ or she wants to meet to get ‘closure’. I have clarity around the fact that the door is firmly CLOSED for me, but my ineffective thoughts are that I am a terrible person if I do not do what she is asking, I owe her an opportunity to get closure for herself, I am a terrible person if I just stop responding to her, I should have been willing to spend even MORE time trying to make the relationship work for me, I am not being kind… of course none of these thoughts are serving me AT ALL. I have listened to Saying Goodbye three times which is what gave me the clarity and courage to let this relationship go. I re-listened to Other People’s Opinions and When Someone Hates You (I am almost wishing she would hate me right now because that feels easier than her wanting to stay connected when I don’t want to…) and I just can’t seem to find what feels like the missing piece for my brain. What is the question that I need to ask myself to find that missing piece?
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!