I am realizing that I’ve been raised to believe that authority is the supreme power in my life to tell me what to think, feel and act.
It’s often misguided me. I’ve given this authority often to my parents, my religion, my spouses, my bosses. Without ever thinking that the most important authority is myself. I am the ultimate authority over my life.
What message or belief deeply rooted drove me away or condition me to believe otherwise? It sabotaged my self-esteem for years.
Now I am in Scholars, have two failed marriages, bouts of co-dependent relationships healing from abuse to self and from others. My biggest life lesson from heartache and pain to come to the conclusion: sweetheart listen to yourself. Do not what others want you to do. Stop living for others! Wake up!
I enter this new phase in life with a new commitment to process emotions, feel the feel to heal, listen to me, have my back, build self-trust and work on meditation and mindfulness.
Here’s a typical powerless MODEL. Can you offer a new thought I can work on to believe in the area of self-trust?
C: I am told if I listen and obey what my parent tells me at age 45, I will be happy
T: It feels safe to listen to authority rather than listen to me
A: Stuck in a job I don’t like, doing things that are not aligned to my purpose, in constant conflict with a parent, my second marriage suffered a great deal
R: I am still dealing with the same issues of listening to authority that is not leading me to peace
C: I make a decision about changing jobs.
T: Even when others oppose, I move forward with my decision.
A: I’ve done it before. Find evidence. I have courage.
R: Keep doing it. Taking the steps. Persist.
T: I know how to listen to me and experience uncomfortable emotions.
T: I am learning to minimize the noise of others telling me what to do so I can listen to myself.