Making decisions about how I spend my free time


I am a teacher and I recently made the decision to study for an exam to become an administrator. I am not in a rush to move into this position, but I would like the credential in my back pocket in case an opportunity arises that I would like to jump on. I took part of the exam at the beginning of February and will receive my results in two more weeks. If I pass this portion of the exam, I will take the last portion at the end of May. I have decided to wait until mid March to start my studying because I know about myself that this is the type of break I need to hunker down and focus and I also need to know if I passed the first exam in case I need to change course prep programs. While I’ve been waiting for my results, I decided to start the Decisions course because this is a huge area in my life I need support in. I have found that I am very proud of myself for the decisions I have made about taking this test, but now I am struggling with how to fill my time as I wait for the results. I have realized that not doing anything is causing me to be very uninspired and bored. Deciding on what to do is making me anxious. Here are my models.

C: Waiting on test results before starting the next thing
T: There’s nothing to do with my day. I need to relax but I’m so bored. I don’t want to do anything that takes a lot of energy.
F: Tired/Bored (tired from negative thoughts)
A: Focus on the negative and fill my time thinking about what bothers me
R: Produce nothing and feel disconnected from my future self

C: Thinking about working on my Etsy planner for next year to fill the time of waiting for my exam results
T: If I’m going to work on anything, it should be my tutoring website because this is something my future self is interested in, but I don’t like the amount of work it takes and by not working on it right now I must just be avoiding it. Both Etsy and the tutoring website are tedious tasks but at least Etsy would be less strategizing and therefore less demanding. I already have a demanding work schedule teaching the after school program and will have to completely stop focusing on whatever I choose for this month once I start studying for the next exam. Etsy would be the best thing because it is something I could complete and check off my list in that timeline. I could still do that with my tutoring website, but wouldn’t have time to tutor once studying starts again. At least the website and advertisement portion would be done though. I could always be brainstorming and writing all of that right now for later so that when it does come time to post it, I have less work on my hands. What if I make the wrong decision about what to focus on and set myself back?
F: Anxious
A: No decision made
R: No progress towards my goals for my future self. More waiting.

Intentional Model- Not feeling connected to this because still anxious about what to choose
C: Brainstorming productive ways to fill my time while I wait for exam results
T: I trust that I made the best decision for my at this time. My past decisions show me that I always do.
F: Focused
A: Decide on something to fill my time with
R: Start producing results for my future self as I wait for my exam results