mom annoyance, again


Hi B,

I wrote last week about how my mom bugged me. You responded . . .she didn’t bug me. My thought about it bugged me. Shit.

So, tonight, bam . . .bugged again. My husband and I have an issue with our financial advisor that we need to clear up. Sent the advisor an email today. (Thought he had sold some of our holdings, but doesn’t look like he has). Was SO very proud of myself of how I handled it emotionally. I was like, “o.k. . . this is the way it is. We’ll find out the facts and move forward.” SO SO SO very different than I would have been in the past (and how I grew up). My husband said he wanted to talk to my dad about it. I agreed, but asked him not to talk to my mom about it because she will go down the worried, negative road that I learned and used to go down. I was putting our son to bed and husband ends up talking to both of them about it. As they were leaving, my parents mentioned that my husband talked to them about the financial issue and that my husband also told them that the advisor offered to let us use his condo in Mexico if we’d like. I said to my mom, “yes, so nice of him.” She says, “Yes, at the expense of your money” (or something to that effect.). They were walking out the door then and I just said, “Good night” . . .as in. . .please leave and I don’t want your thoughts on it.

Sooooo, I know it’s my thought . . .the thought is . . . .My mom can be such a downer. But, it also feels like more than that since it’s something I learned from her and have really tried to recover from. And, I’m celebrating the fact that I handled the incident with the advisor so differently than in the past. Now, if I can handle my mom and her glass half full perspective and not get so bothered by it.

Also a little pissed that husband shared it with her when I just asked him not to. Manual?

Help!