I’ve been running models on the situation that my mother lives with me in my house.

I had a coaching session a few months back where I determined that I DID want her to live with me, and I was going to stop wasting time causing myself suffering by indulging in thoughts about not wanting her here.

After sitting with this thought and being ok with it for a while I’ve decided that the truth is, I don’t want her to live with me. Being honest with this new thought is generating anxiety for me.

Here are my models:

UM
C Mom lives with me
T I have to ask her to move out
F Anxious
A Avoid her, stress out, buffer, get irritated
R I’m behaving like a child

IM
C Mom lives with me
T I want a new arrangement
F Love
A Consider my words carefully, speak the truth in love, discuss this with her, be willing to be uncomfortable, be willing for her and my family to judge me
R I’m honest with myself and with her

I’m not sure about my new T. I know I want to solve for the R – honesty with myself and her. I’ve tried a couple of other thoughts: “I want to say something. I get to choose who lives in my house. Maybe it’s time for a change.” but they all trigger me.

Any suggestions? Thank you