New thoughts disbelief

Hi Brooke!
I’m using the Write it down and move on sheet daily now and it’s doing me a lot of good. However, tonight, I’m working on two new thoughts that I still don’t believe, whatever modifiers I add.
C – watching TV
T – I can watch TV and not do anything else because I have the right to relax
F – agitated, nervous
A – I fidget, I eat peanuts
R – I don’t relax as I add a layer of guilt on top of the agitation and nervousness
I know the thought that comes up is “no you don’t have the right to relax because relaxing is for weaklings. You should be productive at all times”.
C – 8 months in Self Coaching Scholars
T – I’m taking the time to create the best version of myself
F – upset
A – I overeat, I beat myself up
R – I’m far from being the best version of myself
I know the thought that comes up is “you should already be the best version of yourself, that is to say at your goal weight!”
I know that beating myself up is not getting me anywhere. I have this deep-rooted belief that I should make the best of my time every second of it. And yet, I can’t because I’m human and know intellectually I need to relax. But I don’t allow myself to unwind.
I need your help here. Thank you!