I’m working on letting my sister be who she is, accepting her as a human, understanding that she is right about a disagreement she had with my husband because she believes she’s right.  He can be right too.  When I think about what I want in a friend and a sister she isn’t it.  A friend is kind, supportive, someone I can talk to who doesn’t judge me.  I know I am that to her, except I do judge her for the way she treats me and others.  I want to feel peace with letting her live her life and me living mine.  Our lives don’t have to interconnect but it feels like they have to.

Unintentional Model:
C. No communication with sister
T. Sisters are supposed to have relationships/be friends
F. Sad, angry
A. Ruminate, take no action, try to figure out how I want relationship with sister to look
R. No relationship/friendship with sister. Relationship is in my mind. Relationship is negative because I have negative thoughts about her behaviors.

Intentional Model:
C. No communication with sister. But why? When I interact with her I open myself up to criticism, drama, judgement.
T.
F. I need some examples of feelings that might be applicable:
A.
R. I am living a life that is fulfilling, full of people who love and support me. People will act like 50/50 humans and that’s ok.

Struggling with my intentional model.