No forward momentum

I’m stuck in a constant yo-yo from 176 lb to 182 lb for the last 2.5 years. I initially lost from 209 down to 176 between August 2019 and Jan 2020, and then I stalled. I make a meal plan but then I don’t follow my plan. I know not to snack, but then I snack. I say I’m going to only have 2 glasses of wine, but then I have more wine. I ask myself why? But in the moment of the urge I’m like a kid and I just want it, or I’m apathetic, lose my direction. I know the answer is allow the urge, set your protocol, and do not deviate. Why am I not committed to the process? How do I regain commitment to lose weight that is lasting?
I get down to 176 and then start overeating again.