not following the plan


I am having a lot of anxiety and worries about my protocol. Every night last week, I threw up. I don’t know what is causing it but I throw up even if I don’t eat. So, I don’t follow the plan and beat myself up for not being able to do what I said I would. I feel I am losing control of my body and my body is ruling my life and not me.

This is the Model I came up with:

C – Yesterday I had a plan for dinner and I didn’t eat
T – I am not following the plan/guilty
F – Powerless
A – I beat myself up, I worry and doubt my choice not to eat, I go on punishing myself thinking about my not following the plan, feeling guilty, I am disappointed with myself
R – ?

Can you help me with this?