Not showing up


My Mom was going to take me somewhere the other night. She didn’t show up and she didn’t call. I felt very disappointed that we would not be going and doing what we had planned because she didn’t come.

I realize that her what she does or doesn’t do is neutral so if I am disappointed it is because of my thought. I feel like I get a bit confused, because as a human it seems I just have these disappointments that my brain creates sometimes. It seems almost impossible to control them all of the time without having disappointment – is this the 50/50?

If it is me that created the feeling of disappointment, when is it appropriate to tell my Mom that I would have liked her to show up and keep her commitment?

It almost seems like I should just re-think all my problems away, because she can do what she wants to do. The situation likely will keep reoccurring. If I spoke to her she would be aware of it, but may or may not change still. If I told her that I was disappointed that she didn’t come it seems like that is my own problem I need to fix?

Can you give me some thoughts about this?

C. Mom didn’t show up so we didn’t go out
T. I wanted to go out and get together
F. Disappointed
A. I try to think of something else I can do alone, try not to blame Mom, have a lot of thoughts about what happened, tell myself that my feelings don’t depend on what she does or doesn’t do
R. I watch a movie by myself