"People pleasing" the kids at my expense


I “people please” my kids. Their happiness and joy and experience is usually my driving decision making factor.

We are supposed to go camping at a lake in May with friends. My thoughts are…I don’t even like camping. My husband doesn’t like the drive, it’s so far. And he’s not a fan of camping either. The kids should get to experience camping. They love it. W loves to go fishing. And E loves to play in the lake and take the kayak out with me. We would be depriving them of that experience if we don’t go just because the two of us don’t love it. The kids always have a great time. My husband and I enjoy ourselves but it’s not our first choice of vacations. We do it anyway because I don’t want to disappoint the kids.

I can probably give you 5 more examples like this of things I do “for the kids”

I’d like to cancel the trip and use the money we would spend towards a trip all 4 of us would enjoy. But I will disappoint our friends, the kids will be disappointed. I will be thinking “I am letting them down” by not taking them to experience camping.

I’d like to find some new thoughts around this because these thoughts are making me miserable.