Question about relationship

My girlfriend and I are both familiar with the model. She just finished certification and I just got started. In the spirit of growing consciously we decided to be vulnerable with all of what that means. At first we would clean our thoughts and do the work at our end (she did more of the work since she was first introduced to it) I wanted to be at that level so I start being vulnerable without cleaning my thoughts and we were sharing raw material. This was really hard on holding space. What’s the right way to vulnerability? Do we always clean our thoughts first and then we share?